This week I am grateful for my friends Jay, Juliana, and Kezllin. Last weekend, they came over my place to hangout. It was snowy and Icy but they still drove over 40 minutes to see me. We had some pizza and wings for dinner. It is always a great time hanging out with them. We played a fun conversation game called “We’re Not Really Strangers” Thank you so much for visiting me. You all mean a lot to me.
#12: Doctor at Urgent Care
I am very grateful for the kind doctor at Urgent Care in Natick, MA. I woke up on Tuesday morning with a very bad neck pain. I could not move my head left to right or even up and down. I was in so much pain. The doctor at the Urgent Care in Natick was very kind. I felt heard. She ordered that I get an injection of a pain medicine which made my pain go away almost instantly. Thank you so much for treating me. It is incredible that in one hour I was able to access medical care that healed me of excruciating pain. I am very grateful for that.
#13: The Color Purple
I am grateful for the movie the color purple. My girlfriend and I went to the movie theater in Waltham, MA because it was the only theater that was still playing the movie. The music in that film was breathtaking. I am very grateful for being able to experience that moment.
#14: Chocolate Chip Cookies
I am grateful for some delicious chocolate Chip Cookies that I baked this week. I love hot chocolate cookies straight from the oven with FairLife milk. Even thinking about it now makes my mouth watery.
#15: Smell of Coffee
I am very grateful for the smell of Coffee. I personally do not drink coffee but I love the smell of freshly made coffee. My girlfriend has an Nespresso machine which makes really good coffee according to her. I do not like the taste of coffee but I love the smell of it. It never get old.
What are you grateful for this week? If you feel brave, leave it on the comment section. Feel free to also contact me directly.
I only enjoy hot chocolate during the winter season. This week I enjoyed a particularly delicious cup. The hot chocolate was from a beautiful cafe in Lenox Massachusetts.
#7: This Emotional Life
I am grateful for the TV show This Emotional Life on PBS. Hosted by one of my favorite researchers Daniel Gilbert, the show explores the highs and lows of human life. The third and final episode was particularly meaningful. The episode explored what really makes us happy. Thank you Professor Gilbert for always making me think.
#8: First Snow of the Season
I am grateful for the first snow of the season. We received about 4-6 inches of snow on Sunday. It was sunny on Monday morning and the scenery was breath taking. Here is a picture but it does not do it justice
This will probable not be the only time I say this but I love changing seasons. I enjoy experiencing all 4 seasons. Growing in Kenya seasons did not change as drastically and that might be part of the reason I experience the seasons in the way that I do.
#9: New Experiences
I am very grateful for new experiences. Like I mentioned on my first gratitude this week, I was in Western Massachusetts this week. My girlfriend took a road trip for the weekend. I enjoy exploring new places. It makes my heart full of gratitude with every new experience.
I am grateful for the breakfast we had…
I am grateful for beautiful art…
I am grateful for the friendly puppy…
I am grateful for the beautiful view of the town of Great Barrington
#10: Chance Encounter
I am very grateful for the friend we made. She owns a shop in Lenox, MA. We had a lovely conversation that ended up lasting about 40 minutes. We learned that she had recently gotten surgeries to both her arms because she was having a hard time gripping thing. We ended up helping her move one of her merchandise boxes to make her store more accessible. I also learned that she has been to Kenya on a Safari back in 1980s.
Thank you for the lovely conversation.
What are you grateful for this week? If you feel brave, leave it on the comment section. Feel free to also contact me directly.
This week, I am especially grateful for a very kind stranger I met at the Indian Market in Shrewsbury, MA. I was looking for corn flour to make Ugali, a traditional Kenyan dish, for my mother and brother, who were returning from Kenya. I searched all over the store but couldn’t find it. A woman in the same aisle was looking for millet flour for a traditional porridge. I mentioned what I was searching for, and she told me she hadn’t had any luck finding the corn flour there either.
I asked the cashier for help, and after consulting with the manager, they directed me back to the same aisle. The manager explained that if it wasn’t there, they didn’t have it in stock. Just as I was about to leave, the kind stranger called out to me—she had found the corn flour on a hard-to-reach shelf! I was so touched by her effort. Thank you so much for your kindness. My family was grateful too. I wish I had gotten your number to thank you properly.
#2: My Mother
I am always grateful for my mother but this week I am extra grateful. I wouldn’t be where I am today without her. She has single handedly been the biggest influence in my life. I love her and appreciate everything she has done and continue to do for me. She brought me some Kenyan tea from her trip back from Kenya. I am very grateful for her.
#3: Break From Work
I am grateful for the break we received from work. We got the week between Dec.25th-Jan.2 off. I am grateful I got a chance to hang out and catch up with Family and Friends. I am grateful for an opportunity to catch up on some sleep. I am grateful for an opportunity to watch my favorite shows and listen to my favorite Podcasts. I am grateful for an opportunity to rest and recharge.
#4: New Year
I am very grateful for a New Year! I hope to make some great connections this year. I am grateful for new beginnings and a fresh start. I will remind myself to be kind, compassionate, and grateful this year.
#5: Sunset on Dec 26th
I am grateful for the sunset on Dec. 26th. I went for a short walk that day at 4:15pm and I was fortunate to catch a beautiful sight on my walk. Here is the picture…
Nature can be breath-taking and I am grateful for being alive to experience some of nature’s beauty.
I am grateful for Friends. It was my 30th birthday this week and I sure have a lot to be grateful for. First, I am grateful for Friends. My girlfriend pulled off an amazing birthday gift. She secretly invited my close friends to a brewery so they can surprise me for my birthday. It was amazing to celebrate with them. I am very grateful for my friends who came to celebrate with me. A few drove over an hour to be there! Thank you
Girlfriend
I am very grateful for my Girlfriend. Not only did she gather my friends to celebrate my birthday with me, she also pulled off another great surprise. She took me to go watch the Boston Celtics. I am a huge Celtics fan and I had never been to a game before then. She bought us tickets and I got to watch my favorite team live. I am very grateful for her and for the Celtics haha (This is our year!)
Running Water
I am grateful for running water. This week maintenance turned off water at my apartment complex. It was unscheduled and unexpected. I forgot how much we depend on running water. From using the restroom to cooking and cleaning. I take running water for granted even though growing up that was not always a guarantee. Many times I had to go to the local stream to fetch water for cooking and cleaning. I am very grateful for running water this week.
Supervisor
I am very grateful for my supervisor at work this week. She is also the found of the organization that I work for and she gave everyone a Holiday bonus this week. I was not expecting it at all. I am grateful for all the work that she does and for finding me on LinkedIn and for hiring me.
Health
I am grateful for health this week. I was doing paperwork in preparation for a dentist appointment and there was a section where I needed to check off if I had any health conditions. I was completing the application on my phone but even then , I had to go on multiple pages to select if any of those ailments applied to me. This was a reminder to me that good health is not guaranteed. I am very grateful for health.
What are you grateful for this week? If you feel brave, leave it on the comment section. Feel free to also contact me directly.
Does money buy happiness? Well, it depends. The short answer based on decades of research is this, Money has the capacity to make us happier but there are “important exceptions” as a legend in the science of happiness and wellbeing Ed Diener, PHD., wrote in his book “Happiness: Unlocking the mysteries of psychological wealth.”
In this post, I will first talk about the complicated relationship between money and happiness. Next, I will explain the scientific explanation for that complicated relationship. Finally, I will talk about how to be strategic with money to make us happier.
The complicated relationship between money and happiness
If you were to graph on the horizontal axis the increasing annual income and on the vertical axis the happiness and life satisfaction, you would find an interesting relationship between increasing income and happiness in a population. The graph will not be linear but will have a big curve to the right. This indicates that some money when you have nothing will make anyone significantly happier, however, the exchange rate becomes poor once you get to a certain amount. In the United States, that number is $75,000 a year not adjusted for inflation.
You see this pattern everywhere you look. Harvard social psychology professor Daniel Gilbert and one of my favorite researchers reported that people from the United States who make $50,000 a year are much happier than those who make $10, 000 a year. However, those who make $5,000,000 a year, are not that much happier than those that make $100, 000 a year. He continues to explain that “You get 95% of all happiness money can buy with a $75,000 income.” After that, the law of diminishing returns kicks in. At that point, more money has very little influence on happiness and wellbeing. He added that money is like pancakes, the first one if you are hungry is glorious, the second one is pretty good, the third one starts to get uncomfortable, and the fourth and fifth one would make you sick.
The same pattern is true when you evaluate the income of nations economically disadvantaged nations to wealthier nations. Researchers have found people in poor nations report considerably lower level of happiness and wellbeing but nations that are doing fine economically are comparable to wealthy nations on their life satisfaction rating.
It is the same case with increasing material wealth overtime. An eminent Historian Yuval Noah Harari wrote in his fascinating book; Sapiens “the economy has grown exponentially, and mankind today enjoys the kind of wealth that used to be stuff of fairytales.” He later writes that this did not translate to more happiness.
In conclusion, money can buy happiness but only to a certain point. If you have nothing, then more money will make you significantly happier. Once you reach a certain point, the effect of money on happiness and general life satisfaction isn’t great. In fact, chasing more money after that and neglecting other meaningful ways to create happiness would make you unhappy and unsatisfied with your life.
Why is there a complicated relationship between money and happiness?
The explanation for that complicated relationship makes a lot of sense. Increasing income from $10,000 to $50,000 for someone in the United States for example means that this person can now reasonably afford basic needs like food, clothing, and shelter. The anxiety and stress of not being able to have your basic needs met is detrimental to health,happiness, and general wellbeing. However, once those basic needs are sufficiently met, more and more money does little to influence your happiness and general well-being.
So why do we keep chasing more wealth? Why do we always want more money? Why does it always feel like we don’t have enough no matter how much we have? Why do a lot of people find it hard to believe that more money does not mean more happiness? There is a theory that does well explaining why that is.
Like many theories, it starts with our ancestors. For a very long time, our hunter-gatherer ancestors had one path to happiness and general well-being. That was to do whatever possible to survive. Food and other material wealth were scarce and there were potential life ending dangers from the wild as they hunted and gathered for food. Therefore, it made sense why someone in that situation would be preoccupied with attaining as much material wealth. That never ending drive served our ancestors well. Given that tomorrow wasn’t promised, it made sense to work hard to have enough raw materials because that could mean life or death in a likely event of periods of scarcity and Famine.
The same mechanism happens with storing fat. We have the capacity to store extra fat from the food we eat because that served our ancestors well. Having that extra stored fat meant that they were in a better situation to survive the next winter, draught, or other periods of scarcity. In that same way, striving for more material wealth when you have enough to sustain you is as real as that craving for a second slice of chocolate cake when we really don’t need it to live a fulfilling life.
Therefore, our appetite for more wealth is bigger than what wealth can provide for us.
Another reason why more money doesn’t make people sustainably happier is because of a powerful force named the Hedonic Adaptation. Hedonic Adaptation is the greatest friend and enemy for happiness. Hedonic adaption is the simple fact that over time, we get used to our life circumstances. Hedonic adaptation can be well captured with the phrase “This Too Shall Pass” That is great news when negative things happened to us however, that is terrible news when positive things happen to us.
Remember how excited you were when you passed your driving test, got the job, graduated, got a promotion? How long did that feeling last? Days? Weeks?
Now remember how upset you were when your favorite team lost, when a relationship ended, when you failed that test. How long did that feel last? Hedonic adaptation made it possible for you to adjust to those negative life events but had the audacity to steal the joy out of those positive life events. The hedonic adaptation force giveth and taketh away. More on Hedonic adaptation on a later post.
I am sorry if I bummed you out if you believe that money would make you happier only if you made more of it. The research does not support that at all. I am assuming that to some people, this is discouraging to learn. There is some good news. There are other more meaningful ways to create sustainable happiness and general wellbeing. That is what this site is about. In addition, you can be strategic with you money to create more joy, meaning, and general wellbeing.
Buying sustainable happiness
There are a few ways that money can buy happiness. More money can make us happier if you spend it right. Using money to buy happiness will be another post however here are a few tips
Save some money for emergencies and retirement. Extra cash can make the inevitable negative life events less severe. For example, if you unexpectedly lost your job, you can get by till you next job if you have enough money saved. Having enough cash to cover a couple of months to one year of your expenses is a worthwhile investment.
Use money to buy experiences. Do spend money on material goods. We adapt quickly to material goods but not as much from experiences.
Use that cash to travel for example, you will be happy while waiting in anticipation, you will enjoy the experience while it happens, and you will have pictures to reminisce after the fact. On the other hand, try to reminisce about your flat screen TV. It is a bit harder, isn’t it
3. Buy many small pleasures. Research documents that buying small pleasures over a long period of time increases happiness more than buying fewer bigger ones. Go on $20 weekly dates that a $80 date that only happens once a month
4. Be kind with your money. Using 10 dollars on someone that needs it will be more meaningful than indulging it on yourself. Science supports this finding as well.
5. The second part to this is that you can use money to create meaningful social relationships. Positive relationships with family and friends are one of the most powerful sources of happiness, wellbeing, and meaning.
6. Earn money wisely. Earning more money can boost happiness by giving you a sense of competence, security, and personal control. This is advisable. However, earn money wisely as well. Do not sacrifice your health for example for extra money. That is not sustainable.
